My Little White Pill
by Louis Rene
Summary: Indiana is back and ready for chaos. She sends House and Wilson into a romantic vortex. And how does she know House's new employee? Rated M for language and later on, slash.
1. Chapter 1

So this is a spin off of _Indiana_. I knew this character would come in handy.

And I deleted the original "My Little White Pill" because I realized that it was not going to work. So I'm starting from scratch. Good luck... to me. And I know I have this trend now where I use Comedic quotes to start the chapter of my stories. Well, since I'm a stand-up junkie, I say that it's perfectly okay. So fuck you all.

_Disclaimer- I do not own House MD, although I'd be happy if I could possess David Shore's body. Then all my happy, sadistic ideas would be reality. Bwahahahahahaha!_

House - Jimmy. She scares me.

**If you haven't read _Indiana_ yet, click my penname and read it. You won't get anything if you haven't read it.**

Rated M for language and slash later on.

* * *

_My Little White Pill_

_What does the word 'meteorologist' mean in English? It means 'liar.' - Lewis Black_

It was cold. Scratch that. It was _fuck_ cold. House shivered angrily, as he flung his right leg over his bike. Turning the key, he whined. "Come on. Come on. Start, asshole!"

The bike sputtered to life and he sped off toward Princeton-Plainsboro Hospital.

"House!"

"Urgh." He moaned as he limped quickly to the elevator before Cuddy could get ahold of him. He sighed, hugging himself, trying to gain some heat from this god-forsaken building. When the doors slid open, the angry Dean of Medicine was glaring at him. "How do you get up the stairs in heals like those?"

"Easy. I walked."

"Well now. What if all of us could walk up stairs. It would be chaos!." He growled, limping over to his office. His leg was so painful that he nearly ran just to go sit down.

"House, that didn't make any sense. Are you okay?" She asked, following him.

"It's sub-zero temperatures out there and you ask a cripple riding a motorcycle if he's okay?" He spat back.

"Listen. Remember that little Indie girl you had a few weeks ago?"

He thought for a moment. "Oh yes. Little miss 'I'm going to nearly kill myself to prove a point'? Yea. I remember."

"She punched her PT in the face last night and refuses to see anyone else about her leg. I was wondering if you could talk to her."

"And tell her what? All the horror stories of my own physical training? You want me to convince her this is good for her. Well I have news for her. It's hell and a half and it's something she'll have to deal with." He opened the disk drive and popped in a CD.

"I want you to be her physical trainer." She answered bluntly.

He looked up at her. "Why?"

"She claims that PTs are just a bunch of bullshitting assholes who have no concept of pain whatsoever. She says, and I quote, 'they should be shot twice in the leg and then try it out.' She's gone postal on two of them and I was wondering if she had one who's actually gone through a similar pain, she may comply and this hospital can go back to normal."

House sat for a minute, humming along to Sublime. "I'll see what I can do."

"Good. Now. Onto other business. Your new kid. Have you gotten him in here yet?"

"Told him one in the afternoon today."

"Alright. And if you aren't in the clinic by two o'clock today, you're fired."

He pounded the table. "I was so hoping you'd not bring that evil place up in this conversation." He yelled at her retreating heels. "By the way, nice skirt! I see London, I see France!"

Something wasn't right in the office, he noticed as he turned up his computer speeakers. Ah. His little ducklings weren't in the conference room at the moment. 'Wonder where they are. Someone has to do my clinic hours.' He thought limping over to the balcony. He scooped up some snow and rolled it into a ball before tossing it over the small wall at the glass door that led to the office of Dr. James Wilson.

A few snowballs later, the door finally opened and the oncologist appeared with his coat and gloves on. "House. It's the middle of _December_. What do you want?"

"Indiana Charleston knocked out two of her PTs since her surgery. Cuddy wants me to do it."

"Be a physical trainer?"

"Yea."

"Can't we discuss this inside? It's freezing."

House grumbled and tossed his cane over the wall, onto Wilson's feet, and hopped the wall as best he could. They walked into Wilson's office and House felt the wonderful rush of heat flow over him. "Why is your office warmer than mine?"

"Not made of glass." He replied simply. "So you going to do it?"

"What?"

"Physio with Indie."

House raised an eyebrow. "You call her _Indie_?"

"Yea."

"Why?"

Wilson sighed. "She's my niece."

"What? How the hell?" He plopped down onto the couch and looked at his best friend, awaiting an explination.

"Well. My brother's divorced too. And she took her mother's name, rather than his. That's it."

"You treated a family member? How come Cuddy didn't ream you? Oh. I get it. Stay away. She's my piece of ass."

Wilson shook his head at the innuendo. "Cuddy doesn't know. That and I barely knew the girl before this. Her mother's insane, if you don't remember."

House thought back and smirked. Indeed Ms. Charleston had given them a very hard time throughout her daughter's stay. It made perfect sense where the little fireball got her temper. With a mother like that, anyone would go postal one someone.

"Well anyways. Yea. I guess I will. She was an interesting little nutcase, if I remember correctly."

"Oh shut up, House. You liked her cause she's a mini version of you."

"Yea but with boobs and a vagay-jay."

Wilson shook his head. "Crewd."

"Yes. Well. I embrace that side of me." He gave his friend a flash of his famous crooked smile before walking out the office and heading to his own.

__

**** "Well hello, kiddies. Where have you all been?" 

Chase, Cameron and Foreman looked up at him.

"Clinic." Cameron said. "I get them out of the way early."

"Ew. Stop being like Wilson. What about you two?"

"Late." Foreman said. "Overslept a bit."

Chase shrugged. "Late too. Don't have any explination as to why, though."

"I can live with that. Okay, kids. Two big announcements for the day. One. Your new little brother starts today. Be really nice because I wanna be mean first. It's my privilage as the boss. He's a Lab Tech from Ireland. Cool, huh? Any ways. And then numero dos. I'm going to be rather busy. I got roped into a side job that may take up more time than nessicary."

Cameron rolled her eyes. "What could possibly take a lot of time for -"

"I am Indiana Charleston's new physical trainer." He interrupted her.

Everyone stared for a moment.

Chase put his crossword down and looked up at House. "Indiana, the psycho?"

"Yep." House smiled.

"The one who knocked Chase down at least six -"

"Seven." The blonde corrected.

"Seven times?" Cameron asked.

"The one in the same." He said.

Foreman sighed. "The one with that nutso mother?"

"Oh she'll be so happy that you remembered her!" House clapped his hands together and whiped off the whiteboard. "So any new cases?"

"Thirty-two year old man. Yellow." Foreman plopped a file on the table.

"What?" House asked. "Yellow as in what?"

"Skin."

He popped the cap off the marker and wrote 'symptoms' and 'yellow' underneath it. "Any other symptoms."

"Massive fatigue. He hasn't eaten in two days. Only water and some toast, he says. And he's sleeping up to sixteen hours a day."

"Alrighty. Differential?"

"Cirrhosis?" Chase said. "Explains both."

"Hep C." Cameron said.

"Diabetes." Foreman put in.

"Okay." House wrote all possible ideas down and looked at them for a moment. Then he turned and starred at them. "Well? Get testing. Chase. Get a history. I have a pacient to see."

After they left, he pickd up a file labeled 'Charleston, Indiana, C.' "Well, my friend. It's time you and I had a chat." And with that, he limped out of the office.

* * *

Alrighty. It's been a while sinse I posted. Gah! I'm tired of this. Thank god for Full Throttle! 

Click the happy Review button!


	2. Chapter 2

You walk into the small room, tripping over the mess accumulated from over a year. Senshia whipes some soda off her keyboard. "Well this can't be good for the danmed thing. Oh hello, kiddies. Like the last chapter? If you didn't, then what the fuck are you doing here in Chapter Two?" She takes a big gulp from the can in her hand and you can see the words 'Full Throttle' on the side and you ask for a sip. "No effing way. This is mine. What are you doing? Read the damn story." She shoos you away with her giant Japanese Geisha fan.

* * *

_Chapter Two_

_You don't want another Enron? Here's the law: If you have a company, and it can't explain, in one sentence... what it does... it's illegal!  
- Lewis Black_

House sighed and looked at his watch. "Cuddy said eleven a.m. Where is that little Irish brat?" He asked to no one. He was sitting in a PT room, playing his PSP half asses. He was almost looking forward to the visit from this little angry girl.

The door opened and a flood of voices filled the room.

"Well if you would just let me help you -"

"Mom! I got it. Let the frick go! House." The red-headed young woman barked. "Tell her to get out, _please_."

He looked over at her. Indiana had thick, red hair with the Wilson trademarked brown eyes that make any person squirm. She was on the short side for a twenty year old but you could tell that she could hold her own against almost anyone. _Now_, however, she was supporting herself against anything other than her mother.

The mother, Sarah Charleston, was also very short, almost shorter than her daughter. Her copper hair was cropped short and her eyes were vivid green. She was thin and spoke with a slight Irish accent.

"Well, Ms. Charleston. It's marvelous to see you again but I must insist you leave the room. Indiana is quite old enough to not have her mommy in the room." House said, smiling sarcastically.

She huffed, gave her daughter one last look before departing to the waiting room. She walked over to the nurse's station. "Could I get a page for Docter James Wilson, please?"

Back in the PT room, Indiana took a seat in the chair opposite House. "Thank the Lord Almighty she's out of here. She's been on my case sinse I left this wretched place._ Indie, honey. Can I help you? _and _You really should get crutches, dear_. It's driving me off the wall."

"Stupid idea to ask how you've been?"

"_No_." She said.

"Hinted sarcasm?"

"_Emphisized_ sarcasm, actually. So. You're my new physical trainer?"

He nodded. "Yep. I heard you knocked out Dr. Karrey."

"Gunna yell at me for it?"

"Nope." He answered, getting up and walking over to the closet. "I was going to thank you. You did something I've been wanting to do sinse the shmuck got here."

She smirked. "Whatchya doin'?"

He pulled out a pair of crutches.

"Oh _fuck_ you." She got up and started toward the door.

"Ah ah ah!" He quickly limped to block her path. "Do you want to walk again?"

She glared at him.

"Well you need to start somewhere. I had to do the same thing, and I didn't like it either. That's why you're here, right? That's why I'm here. Because you felt that the other trainers didn't understand. Well I do."

She glared again before heading back to her seat.

"Wait. I gotta get these at the right setting."

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Wilson stared at the woman for a second. "Okay. So you pull this girl out of my brother's life, yell at me for hours while Indie's in the hospital and then accuse me of instilling a want to see her father in her. Then you want me to take care of her for you?"

Sarah sighed. "Please, James. She likes you. She likes House. And I know you're living at his place for a while. It's just a week. I have to fly to New York for this business trip and I need her to continue physio with House. Please, James. Just a week. She'll study here until her physio and then she'll study some more afterward."

"And when she doesn't study?"

"She has her little games and her laptop. I'm _begging_ of you."

He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it for _her_." He clarified.

She let out a sigh of relief.

-One hour later.-

House rubbed his temples. Now he knew why a physical trainer would want to kill themselves. That was the longest and most painful hour in his life. Indiana was a stubborn little maggot sometimes.

"Tests negative for Cirrhosis and Hep C." Foreman and Chase walked in.

Cameron came in about two seconds later. "It's not Diabetes."

"How's the vitals?"

"Fine. His condition isn't bad. Just odd. Why?"

"Going to lunch. Page me if anything happens. Come up with new ideas and get some tests." he tossed Foreman the marker. "You are the keeper. Use your posistion well."

He limped over to Wilson's office and knocked. "Lunch time. Feed me." He called in. No answer. He toussled the handle for a second. "Locked."

The door to Dr. Lisa Cuddy's office slammed open. She jumped. "House. What is it?"

"Where's Wilson?"

"Left early. Why?"

"What for?"

She sighed. "Not sure. He said family issues. And then he left. What? Didn't bring any money for lunch?" She asked, smirking.

"Can you spare a few bucks?" He asked, giving her his _'look-at-me-I'm-an-adorable-little-cripple'_ look.

She opened her purse and gave him a twenty. "Don't forget Clinic duty!" She called after him.

"Clinic what?" He called back and was gone.

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Cameron and Foreman sat in the MRI's safe room, scanning the results on the screen. "Just guess and check, that's it? No random guesses for him?" He asked.

"Doesn't seem very House-like, huh?" She said. "Maybe it was that little Indiana brat."

He chuckled. "Don't like her?"

"She's rotten to the core, that one. Normally, I like to see the best in others but she makes it impossible."

"Yet you think House isn't a hopless cause? So. What do you think of House hiring another person?"

She shrugged. "Don't know. But I don't see the need."

"Worried it's gunna be a hottie to take House's affections?"

She scoffed. "Hardly."

"Well. There aren't any tumors." He sighed.

Cameron stared at the images for a moment. "But there's scarring."

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House looked at his watch. "One o'clock. Where is the little-"

"_Twerp_?" An Irish accent interrupted him.

House looked up and saw Ien McArtur standing in the doorway. He had shoulder-length black hair and vivid blue eyes. Not like House's own blue. This was a deep blue, very close to the blue on the American flag. He was also on the short side. "Good afternoon. You are just in time. I assume Dr. Cuddy already gave you a lab coat and a name tag."

"She did."

"Good. Now you need to meet-"

"Dr. House. It's not a tumor." Cameron walked in with Foreman. She looked at the newcomer and held out her hand. "I'm Allison Cameron."

"Damien McArtur. Pleasure."

"Eric Foreman." The farker man also shook his hand. "So you're the new lab tech?"

"Aye. I thought there were three of you."

Chase barged in, holding the files. "Well this is a _boring_ history."

"Hi, Rob."

Chase stopped dead in his tracks and looked up at Ien. "Hi."

House looked from one to the other. "Know each other?"

"Yea." Ien smiled. "Roomed together at college."

"But Chase is Australian." Foreman pointed out.

"Yes but the late Dr. Chase was rich enough to send his son to a university in London." The Irish doctor answered.

"_Damnit_!" Everyone looked at House. "I owe Wilson fifty bucks."

"What?"

"We had a bet. He noticed you guys were from the same college. He said you knew each other. I said you didn't. Damn you."

"Oh real nice, House." Cameron scolded. "Betting on him before his first day."

"Wanted to get a good start. _What_?" He shrugged his shoulders. "Okay _mom_. I'll be nicer. Not."

"So were you guys friends?" Foreman asked.

"Don't we have a pacient to get to?" Chase asked.

Ien rolled his eyes. "Avoid the subject. Yea. That'll work."

"His name is Carl Manning." The Australian continued in an agitated voice. "He has no family history of cancer or major allergies. His -"

"Wait." House interrupted him. "Why are you avoiding the subject?"

"Can we please focus on our jobs, not my personal life? His parents are-"

House snatched the history from him. "Why are you avoiding the subject?" He repeated.

Chase sighed. "I'm not telling."

"Fine. Miccy, here, will tell us." He slung an arm around Ien's shoulers. "Won'tcha, buddy?"

Ien smirked at Chase before pulling the file out of House's grasp and looked over it for a moment. "Did you check for an allergy that might not be genetic?"

"No way. It's a damn conspiracy. Come on!"

Ien laughed. "You just met me for the second time. You've had Rob employed here for a while. Let him tell you. God forbid I ruin his reputation here."

"Oh how gracious of you." Chase scoffed.

Ien glared intently at him for a moment. "It was your issue to begin with. Don't you take Daddy's anger out on me."

"Oooh. _Tension_. I love it." House rubbed his hands together. "So. Chase. You take little leprechaun with you and show him around. Cameron. See if you can get anymore info out of our lovely liver-scarred guy. Foreman. Wanna do my Clinic hours? Pa-_wease_?" He put on his face and batted his eyes.

"Do your own hours. I'm grabbing lunch."

House groaned and grabbed his cane.

"Let's just get this over with." Chase said, sighing. "This is the Clinic. You have a certain amount of hours you have to do here. Dr. Cuddy, Dean of the hospital, will be on your case if you don't-"

"I should be the angry one here." Ien said, cutting him off.

"Can we just get this over with, Ien?" Chase ased.

Ien stared at the blond for a moment. "Yea, sure."

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"Dr. House checks out, five pm. Write that down."

"It's not even quarter of five, House." Cuddy said.

"I have to get home and see what's up with Wilson. It's killing me." He said, limping away.

The ride home was fairly warmer than the ride to work. The sun was out, heating up the leather seat of the motorcycle. He arrived at the apartment to see Wilson's car parked outside. And from the sidewalk. House saw the oncologist bustling about.

"Wilson. Why weren't you at lunch? What was the big-" He stopped dead to see wavy red hair on one of the bean bags that took the place of his couch.

Indiana looked over her shoulder, pausing her game. "Your high score on this thing sucks ass."

* * *

Senshia shoved another handfull of home-made snack mix into her mouth and looks at you. "Well? Like it?" She holds her energy drink can upside-down as a few drops fall from the rim. "Damn. I'm all out." 


	3. Chapter 3

Senshia's hands are shaking and her eye is twitching. You ask what's wrong. "Caffene-induced insomnia." You ask if that's really good for her health. "Oh shut up and read Chapter 3." She smacks you with her fan.

* * *

_Chapter Three_

_MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken. - Lewis Black_

"Wilson!" House called from the door way without looking away from the little demon sitting in front of his TV in his apartment.

"Oh House! You're home." Wilson walked in from the spare room. "You know, now I don't have a place to sleep."

"Wilson. Shut up. What the hell is she doing here?"

"You didn't tell him, Jimmy?" Indie asked, resuming her game.

"Oh _fuck_. I forgot." He sighed. "House. Listen. She has nowhere else to go."

"Yea. What about her _home_?" House asked, limping into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and grabbed a beer. "You know. Where she _lives_?"

"House. Her leg. She can't be living alone until her PT deems it okay for her to live unassisted." Wilson said, following him into the bathroom. "Listen. It's only a week. She's tired, she's hurt and she's in pain. And her mother really can't avoid this trip. It's her job. She's going to come to work with me, do her school work, go to physio with you, play her little games or whatever, and then come back here with me."

House sighed and looked back at the girl who was whooping with glee as she entered her initials into the high score yet again. The once reigning GH was now outranked four to three by a certain IC. "Fine. She can stay. But she better not have the trademarked Jimmy morning patterns."

"Where am I gunna sleep? The couch is gone due to your clumsiness." He smirked, recalling House's ruined prank. Suffice to say the couch was retired and they resorted to beanbags. Also, House had to then reveal the existence of his very small spare room. But now with Indiana, James had nowhere to sleep.

"If you promise that you don't kick..." House said, implying his own bed.

"I don't."

"Good." House nodded and limped back into the living room, plopping into the bean bag next to the redhead's. "Oi. My turn." He snatched the controller from her.

"Hey! I was playing that!" She protested, grabbing at the controller.

"Yes. Well now _I'm _playing."

"Wow." Wilson watched the fight with astonishment. "Two cripples, fighting over a videogame like two ten-year-olds. Sad, really." He smiled and shook his head, catching one last glance at the two before resuming his place in the kitchen, preparing dinner... again.

He lifted the top to the large pasta pan and examined the contents within. Just another hour of boiling and his home-made broth would be finished. As he reached for a knife to start chopping vegetables, he stopped.

_"So. What exactly is your relationship with House?" _

_Indiana's earlier question came back to him._

_"He's my best friend." He had answered._

_She sighed and looked away. "Sure he is."_

_"Are you suggesting that House isn't my friend?" He asked her, pulling out extra pillows from the closet._

_"Not exactly." She cleared her throat and hobbled over to him. "Are you guys more than friends?"_

_He laughed nervously. "Where did that come from?"_

_"Oh come on. You don't see it? Honestly. Love must be blind if you haven't figured it out yet. The way you guys talk. The way you laugh and you're eyes sparkle when you talk about him. It's actually sickening if you think about it."_

_He plopped the blankets and pillows on the air mattress. "You don't know what you're talking about."_

_"Sure I don't." She smiled slyly and hopped on one foot to the living room._

_"Hey! Use your crutches!"_

He snapped out of it and resumed his actions. What does a girl that they barely know, know about him and House? There's no way. She's just being her evil little self, giving insane, homoerotic notions.

"So. House."

"Hmmm?" He didn't look at her. He was too focused on beating her score.

"What's with you and Jimmy?"

"Whaddaya mean?"

She sighed and looked over at the kitchen, smiling. "Ya know. Like have you guys done it?"

"Done what?"

"God you're thick. _Sex_."

There was a bleeping sound as House's guy died by oncoming firepower. He slowly turned to her. "_What_?"

"You heard me."

"Yes. And I had hoped it wasn't what I thought. What do you think?"

"Well. You guys definitely make a cute couple. Demented and strange, but cute." She smirked and snatched the controller back from him.

"Where did you come up with this idea?" He asked, looking at her with surprise.

"You haven't heard? I couldn't pass three people in the hospital without hearing a debate about you two. God you guys must be blind. And I thought you were smart, House. You disappoint me." She clicked her tongue in shame as she knocked his score down another peg.

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The shower stopped and the sound of a hair dryer could be heard. A few minutes later, Indiana emerged from the bathroom, adorned in a pair of black and green plaid pajama pants and a black beater tank top. She limped into the kitchen and the two doctors could hear the sound of a plastic wrapper crinkle and within minutes, the beeping and then whirr of the microwave oven could be heard.

"What are you making?" Wilson asked.

"Oh. It's just some popcorn." She called back as they heard her shuffle around in the cupboards. A few minutes later, she limped back through the living room, trying not to spill the popcorn that was held in a large, metal mixing bowl.

"You're not eating that whole thing." Wilson said, raising an eyebrow.

"Of course I am." She stated, popping a kernel into her mouth and munching on it happily.

"Need help?"

"Nah. I'm fine." She lied.

House and Wilson smirked at each other and got up. House grabbed the bowl and Wilson grabbed the girl.

"YOU FUCKERS! LET ME GO!" She flailed but Wilson was a lot stronger than she had imagined. He looped one arm behind her knees and caught her back with the other and then carried her into her room as House followed with the popcorn. The oncologist gently set Indiana on the air mattress and House plopped the bowl into her lap and walked out.

"Night." Wilson smirked.

As they sat down to their movie they heard, "Hey! What happened to half my popcorn?!"

House held the plastic mixing bowl up to his best friend and Wilson grabbed a handful of the buttery popcorn. "That was mean."

"Yea. But at least I got my revenge. How dare she mess with my scores." House grumbled.

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House was warm. He was nice and warm and his bed was soft and it was a great thing until...

"OH MY GOD, WILSON! COULD YA SNIP YOUR TOES ANY LOUDER?!"

He smirked. House had gotten used to his buddy's annoying morning habits and managed to sleep through them. Indiana, he was sure, was just not a morning person. And House laughed out loud when he heard. "INDIE! GET THE HELL OUT! I'M _NAKED_!"

"OH AND YOU THINK I HAVEN'T SEEN NAKED MEN BEFORE?! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!"

"I'M NOT KIDDING! PUT THAT DOWN, INDIANA!"

"THEN SHUT THE HELL UP!"

House finally pushed himself to his feet and limped over to the bathroom door. Wilson was trying to get his own towel away from the angry redhead, whose hair was frizzed to the point of fro. She snapped him in the thigh with the towel.

"OW! _FUCK_! THAT HURTS!"

"Awwww... poor baby." She cooed. "Here. Lemme distract you from the pain." And with that, she snapped him in the calf.

"INDIE! STOP!"

"Ummm..." House said, chuckling. "As amusing as this is, my land lord will kill me if you don't quiet down."

"Then get her to STOP!" Wilson yelled, trying to wrestle the towel away from her.

House shrugged. "Hard to do. I'm a cripple, remember?"

"_She's _a cripple. _Remember?_" Wilson retorted, managing to get the towel away and wrapped it around himself.

Indiana yawned and started to hop back to her room. "I'm going back to bed."

Wilson sighed. "You have to be ready by eight thirty!"

"Well it's six right now. It doesn't take me two and a half hours to get ready. I'll get up a half past seven. Until then, I'd better not hear any more nail clipping or I may just kill myself."

"Wait till he dries his hair." House groaned.

"Oh. With his beloved dryer? The one I hid until you shmucks reimburse me for the popcorn you stole?"

"WHAT!?" Wilson exclaimed.

She door shut with a snap, leaving a hysterical House and gaping Wilson.

"Good luck, buddy." House said, returning to his own bed.

Wilson sighed as he pulled his clothing on. This girl was more hassle than he bargained for. And with House there to egg her on, the poor oncologist was in for a trying week. His thoughts lingered over his best friend for a moment. Rash, abrasive, angry and rude to an extent that a farm boy would find offensive. Yet here he was, living with the prick... again. Maybe Indiana had a point. To the untrained eye, their friendship just didn't make any sense. They were mean to each other one second, and then laughing with each other the next. And on more than one occasion, Cuddy had referred to them as the 'old married couple.'

He groaned. How was he going to deal with his hair without his hair dryer? "Damn you, you little Irish demon." He muttered to the door.

Indiana finally woke to the wonderful smell of waffles. She managed to dress in her jeans she acquired from the men's department in Sears and a grey sweater. She walked out into the kitchen and inhaled the wonderful smell. "You can cook, Jimmy-boy?"

"Like a god." House replied, fully dressed and awaiting his breakfast.

"You make such a cute housewife." She giggled, sitting next to the diagnostician.

Wilson sighed. "What makes you think _you're _getting any?"

"Because if you don't make me any, I'll just steal off your plate."

"Oh yea, House. She's _not _a miniature version of you." He said, sarcastically. He plopped a plate in front of both of them.

Indiana and House both smiled happily and fought over the syrup.

An hour later, after Wilson found himself cleaning up syrup from every corner of the kitchen (the syrup fight between the gimps had turned to total warfare), they found themselves outside.

"I wanna go on the motorcycle." She stated, looking at the orange and white hunk of junk that was House's vehicle.

"Ummm... do you know what your mother would do to me if she learned that I let you drive with _House _on a _motorcycle_?" Wilson asked, helping her to the car.

"I trust he won't crash. Please? Pretty pretty please with a cherry on top?" She asked, giving him her best puppy dog pout.

He sighed, realizing the torture that the Wilson brown eyes brought upon people. "Fine. Fine. But House has to drive like a normal human being so I can give her her crutches. Unless you have a place to put them. Which I highly doubt."

"YEAY!" She clapped her hands together and grabbed the extra helmet out of House's hands. She swung her left leg over the cycle and scooted into a comfortable position behind House.

"BE CAREFUL!" Wilson yelled as they sped off. "Oh I am gonna _die _by the end of this week."

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"That was _awesome!_" Indiana said, hopping off and landing on her right foot. "Out of all the things I did in spite of my mother, a motorcycle is not one of them."

"Really? What have you done?" He asked and then added quickly. "I'm not Wilson. I won't rat you out."

"Well what do you wanna hear about? The drugs, the alcohol in Ireland or the sex?"

"Child after mine own heart." He said with a sniff of pride before pulling his coat tighter around himself. "Why aren't you cold?"

"Spent a semester in Ireland. Now _that's _cold. This is nothing." She smirked, leaning against the handicapped sign. "Ah. Here's Jew-boy."

Wilson was striding toward them with his briefcase around his shoulder and a pair of crutches under his arms. "It's cold. Let's go." He said, shoving the crutches at her.

"Baby." She smirked as they headed into the building.

As they walked into the warm hospital, they heard a shrill "_WILSON! HOUSE!_" They turned to see Dr. Cuddy walking toward them with a scowl on her face. "What is the meaning of you two housing a patient in your _home_?!"

The two specialists glanced at each other, both with the same, unmistakable word stamped on their forehead.

Indiana decided to vocalize said word as she smirked. "_Busted_"

* * *

Senshia throws the key board across the room. "GAAAAAH! Kill me!" She yells. She realizes that you're there and she laughs nevously. "Heh heh..."

Click that happy review button.


	4. Chapter 4

You help Senshia tape the bottom on the keyboard back into place. "Thanks. Sorry about that. Frustrated." You tell her it's no problem. She sighes and realizes that there is nothing to eat... again. "Aw fuck."  
-This will be my last OC in this story! I promise!

* * *

_Chapter 4_

_I'd rather go ice fishing, which is the dumbest thing a man can do. You're sitting essentially in an out house. You've cut a hole in the ice, and you're fishing for fish that you shouldn't eat, 'cause any fish that is down there is fucking stupid.  
__- Lewis Black_

"You treated your _niece_?!" Cuddy's shriek could have been heard all the way in diagnostics where House's team was probably wondering where their boss was.

"I knew you couldn't get away with it." House teased, smirking at Wilson.

"Shut it, House." She snapped. "You're letting her live with you. What did Ms. Charleston think about all this?!" She paced the room as her two employees sat in the chairs opposite her desk. They actually looked like two troublemakers in middle school, being scolded by their large-chested principal.

"With all due respect, doctor." Indiana spoke up from the couch. "Ma asked Wilson if he could take care of me. You see. My father and her had a huge issue and when they split, she cut me from the whole Wilson family. We don't even keep kosher anymore. Regardless. I'm sure he was just trying to help her. I mean, it's not like I can take care of myself right now. I don't even get to go to school. I have Kitty e-mail me notes."

Cuddy looked over at her. "You don't feel uncomfortable with this?"

Indiana shook her head.

The dean sighed. "Listen. House can continue PT with her. But James. You can't be her oncologist anymore. Policy won't allow it and niether will I. You pick a doctor under you to monitor her condition. Am I understood?"

They both nodded.

"And, Miss Charleston. How do you plan on spending your time here?" She asked the redhead.

"School work."

"Laptops aren't allowed."

House spoke up. "She can use my computer. We have the extra in the department if we need it."

"Fine. But no trouble. Am I understood?" She eyed all three of them with great suspicion.

Glancing at each other and giving Cuddy their best innocent smiles, the three of them said "Yes, mommy." almost simultaneously.

Cuddy sighed and looked at Wilson. "Those two are a bad influence on you."

"Aw. Does that mean we can't hang out anymore?" House asked, getting to his feet.

As they walked out, Cuddy buried her face in her hands. "Man it's gonna get chaotic in this place."

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"She's nice." Indie smiled evilly as they walked off the elevator. She followed House as Wilson parted to his office.

"You two _behave_."

They looked around, feigning confusion. "You talking to us?" House asked.

"We're as innocent as a kitten." She smiled. Wilson opened his door and was gone. "With _really_ sharp claws." She finished as soon as he was out of ear shot.

House chuckled as he walked into the conference room. The four ducklings sat there. "I'm just saying, if you had to..." Chase looked up, trailing off. "Oh. You're here."

"Yes I'm here. With a stowaway."

Indiana waved at them.

"Do I wanna..." Ien stopped as he turned to see the girl standing behind them. "Charlie?"

"Hiya, Ien." She beamed.

House looked at them. "Know each other? And what's with the name Charlie?"

"I roomed with his family when I spent that semester in Ireland. And he got Charlie from my last name. _Duh_."

"So this is the sex, drugs and alcohol you told me about?" He asked.

"Sex? No. Alcohol?" Ien asked. "Well. Yea. The alcohol was all my fault. Honestly. She was a kid in Ireland as an exchange student. What else could ya do in the world's drinking capital?"

Chase sighed. "Why is _she_ here? Her physio's in the afternoon."

"Well. She's staying with me this week. Mom called in a favor. Always a pleasure doing business with the _devil_." House shuddered thinking about the dreaded Ms. Charleston.

"Why you?" Foreman asked.

"Wilson's my uncle."

"Ew." Ien said. "He's _Jewish_."

"And your ex-boyfriend's _catholic_." She snapped back.

Ien feigned hurt. "Don't tease him. He's very sensitive."

House coughed into his coffee. "You're gay?"

"Problem?" He asked.

"No. No. Just something else to harass you about." He stated.

"So we have to live with the spawn of Satan for a week?" Chase asked.

"_I_ get to live with her. You only have to deal with her while she's at work." House pointed out.

"Aw poor baby. Live with her for a few _months_." Ien said, shuddering at the memories.

"Number one!" She said in her own defense. "I'm standing _right **here**_. Second: we had a lot of fun times back in the old country, Ien. Admit it. Me, you, your brother and Logan had a grand old time so shut it."

Cameron sighed. She really didn't want to deal with Indiana. "Why aren't you in Wilson's office?"

"Well. This office is nice and shiny. I absolutely love feeling like a fish." She snapped back, wiggling around to mimick a fish.

"Just like House." Foreman mumbled under his breath.

"Wait." Chase looked up at his boss in confusion. "Does Cuddy know that you're housing a patient?"

"Does Cuddy know that I stole her _panties_?" He replied. "Okay. Anyways. Indie. Computer's in there. The password's ElPeloDelChase."

She raised an eyebrow. "The hair of Chase?"

"I get bored. Remind me to change it later."

Chase shook his head, trying to reason what he heard. "Why is your password about my hair?"

"It's shiny and nice to look at."

Foreman chuckled.

"Glad you encourage this." Cameron said in her monotonous tone she uses when annoyed.

He just shrugged.

Ien shook his head, smiling. "Lighten up."

"Yea, Cameron." House said. "Lighten up. I mean, come on. You had sex with Chase. You can't tell me that his hair isn't nice to look at."

The Australian sighed and rolled his eyes.

"You had sex with him?" Ien asked. "Sorry."

Chase's eyes narrowed as he glared at the Irishman.

House looked from one to the other. "Oh ho _snap_!" He cackled in glee. "This is gunna be fun. Something huge must have happened in order to get that look from Chase."

All of a sudden, three beepers went off.

"Go see what's wrong." House said, nodding in dismissal. "And bring Leprechaun with you."

When they were gone, he limped over to his office where Indiana was typing away feverishly. "Whatchya working on?"

"A paper for psych." She replied bluntly, not looking at him.

"Specifics?" He asked, sitting down in the yellow chair.

"I'm supposed to analyze a traumatic experience and how it would affect the mind."

"Gunna use your little cancer episode?"

"Can't. It cannot be first person. But worry not. My best friend is going to use it for her paper. Speaking of which, is it okay if she stops here for her paper? We can go anywhere where it's okay."

He shrugged. "I don't mind. As long as you don't get in the way. What's your major?"

"Human relations and psychology. I want to be a part of the nature vs. nurture argument. She wants to be a psychologist."

"Ah."

"I would ask you if you should go see if your patient's okay, but that's a stupid question." She smirked.

He chuckled as he stared at her fingers flying across the keyboard. "When is she showing up?"

"Dunno. I said anytime between five minutes ago and an hour from now. She'll show up in the office. We GPA each other."

"What's it like, going to Princeton?" He asked.

"I hate school. Not as much as I hated high school. But I still hate it. If it weren't for my Japanese class, I might have killed myself." She chuckled. "Maybe I can escape that wretched woman and spend a semester there."

"You hate your mom that much?" He asked.

"Would you hate your mother if she cut the cord from half of your family?"

He sat and stared at her for a moment. She had never shown any type of pain from that comment. Come to think of it, she never showed pain at all. When Wilson picked her up the night before during the popcorn ordeal, she should have been in excruciating pain. But not even a wince. "How much does your leg hurt?"

"Out of the blue." She said, not stopping her typing. "Why?"

"Just answer the question."

She stopped typing but didn't look away from the screen. "Only a little."

"Strange. My leg kills and I'm on Vicoden half the time."

She glared at him. "I'm fine. I don't need your help."

"Come to think of it, you aren't on any pain medication, are you?"

"Shut up, House."

"So it really doesn't hurt or you're somehow ignoring the pain."

"I said SHUT_ UP_!" She yelled and stood to her feet. She bypassed her crutches and limped over to the door but stopped. A young woman stood in the conference room. She was on the weighty side with long, blond curls. She smiled when she saw Indiana.

"Indi-chan!" She yelped and ran over to her friend.

"Kitty!" She hugged the blond and smiled a bit. "How are you?"

"Oh the same as always. And so are you, by the sounds of it. I could hear you yell from down the hallway." She giggled and looked over at House who had gotten up to follow Indiana. "Who are you?"

"Doctor House. I'm Indie's doctor." He nodded at him.

"You're gimpy." She stated bluntly. Then she started to twitch slightly. "Kit! Kit! _Kitty_!"

"She uh... she has Tourette's." The Irish girl explained. "Ignore the random outbursts."

"Kitty!" She clapped her hands together and bounced up and down.

"And she refuses medication."

"We have bad news." Foreman said, walking in. He stopped to look at Indiana's friend. "Who's this?"

"Indie's buddy. Ignore her. What's wrong?" House said.

"The patient is vomiting blood."

* * *

Senshia sniffles a bit. "God I hate being sick. Anyways. You like it? By the way, Kitty is based on my happy little beta-reader. And she's actually like that. Scary? Yes." She blows her nose in a Kleenex. "Gah!" 


End file.
